Read the storm clouds early
Tantrums rarely arrive without warning. Notice the clenched fists, faster breathing, or rapid-fire requests. Label what you see out loud: "I see your shoulders getting tight; something feels really big right now." Naming it keeps your child tethered to you instead of the meltdown.
Ground yourself so you can ground them
Kids borrow our nervous system. Take one deep belly breath, plant your feet, and lower your voice. Use a simple mantra like "Calm is contagious" while you exhale longer than you inhale. This 10-second reset keeps your prefrontal cortex online so you can co-regulate.
Create a safe container for the feelings
Offer physical and sensory anchors—press your palms together, place a cool washcloth on their cheeks, or guide them to stomp slowly like an elephant. Invite rhythmic movement and slow counting ("five fingers, five breaths") to shift energy from fight/flight toward rest/digest.
Close the loop once calm returns
After the storm, stay curious instead of corrective. Ask, "What did your body need?" Brainstorm a simple plan—water, quiet corner, or squeeze ball—and log the insight in Mom&Dad Tracker. Repeating the loop turns grounding into a shared ritual, not a last-resort reaction.